30weeks3days

I blogged yesterday about how hard life is for me and Tupes right now and I felt that I should blog more often. To let things out of my system instead of keeping everything cooped up inside.. you know?

I woke up this morning to use the bathroom and it seems to me that it's starting to be a daily routine. It doesn't matter how late I go to bed, I always get up to pee around 7. After I relieve my bladder, I go back to bed.. and stare at the walls and ceiling. I can NEVER go back to sleep after that, I have no idea why.

Well this morning was different. I knew why I couldn't go back to sleep. I, for some reason, thought of how far along I am in my pregnancy and well.. I realized I only have 8 weeks left. Saying "2 months" instead of "8 weeks" makes the time seem longer.. but hearing myself say "8 more weeks? 8 more weeks??! 8 more weeks...." damn sure got me nervous & scared.

I swear to you, so many things ran through my mind -- labor and delivery, breastfeeding.. what if she doesn't like breastmilk? How big will she be? Will she even fit through my pelvis? Will I be able to take the pain? -- I had all these thoughts in mind that I just had to get up and do something; so I cooked me some breakfast.. HA.

But really though, how will I be during labor? How will I take the pain? All these things are hitting me and it's making me real nervous. 8 weeks is not too far away. I can actually POP anytime now.. just hope I don't though. September 26 is the date I'm praying to God, he'll give me my babygirl.. It's my mom's birthday, so I hope He's listening kus it'll be the best day ever for the three of us.

I don't know.. I guess it's just that time to count my weeks down and wait for that flush of fluid. Next thing I know, she'll be out & in my arms. Just biting my nails about the process I have to go through, yikes. As of now, I'll take things one day at a time and enjoy these last few weeks as me; kus I know I'll miss it. But really tho..

8 MORE WEEKS?!!!